Have you ever felt guilty for taking time for yourself? I know I have. For years, I struggled with the idea that self-care was selfish.
When my kids were little, I started working out to lose the baby weight. But along the way, it became so much more—I fell in love with it. Running 5Ks became my escape. I’d put my music on and just go, letting the stress of work and motherhood melt away.
Exercise helped me manage my anxiety and depression, but not everyone saw it that way. Someone close to me told me I was being selfish. They made me feel like a bad mom and wife, saying I was spending too much time running and working out when I should have been home taking care of my family.
At first, I fought back because I knew I needed it. But over time, the fight no longer seemed worth it. So, I quit. I gave up on my goals. I gave up on myself.
And you know what? That didn’t make me a better mom or wife. It did the opposite. I gained the weight back, my health declined, and I sank deeper into depression. I was still showing up for my family, but I wasn’t really present. I was just… there. My marriage? Well, that ended too.
Through it all, I realized something: I need self-care. I need to take care of myself. For me, self-care is exercise. Lifting weights, pushing myself—it makes me happy. It makes me a better person.
Over the years, I’ve fallen in and out of my self-care routine, and I can always tell when it slips. I become easily agitated, anxious, and negative. I have to remind myself, over and over, that self-care isn’t just okay—it’s necessary. When I take care of myself, I’m a better mom, partner, friend, and employee. And self-care doesn’t have to be elaborate. Sometimes, it’s as simple as a quick walk to clear my head.
It’s different for everyone. Maybe for you, self-care is grabbing a coffee, getting your nails done, reading a book, or listening to music. Maybe it’s talking to a friend or just sitting in silence for a few moments. Whatever it is, don’t compare your self-care to anyone else’s.
This is your life, your journey. You know what’s best for you. And you deserve to take care of yourself—without guilt.
